Tuesday, June 30, 2009

SKIPPY!TAKE HEED!



Sunday, June 28, 2009

IT'SCIRCUSWEEK!



Saturday, June 27, 2009

Hoarding Is NOT Funny!



Friday, June 26, 2009

Joe StumpeI Touched Neil Young's Car Today



A local boy, going to see him tonight at a puke bar. Interestingly enough, Neil Young has his car worked on here, have no idea why.
Drive by these places on a daily basis.

This Is Whack!



The Dating Game



Captain EO





Pay Heed!



In The Vast-i-ness Of The InterwebNo One Can Hear You Scream!



Thursday, June 25, 2009

Maybe I'm Amazed!




Here's something odd:

Any post which has the least little reference to sex gets 200%
(a very large number)
as many hits as any other.

What's with that?

So... gonna put the words "Live Nude Girls" on every post!
("Live"? the alternatives make me shudder?)

Wednesday, June 24, 2009


Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Bully!



Sunday, June 21, 2009

Throw Yer Hands In The AirLike Ya Just Don't Care


Ok, Skippy, I have like zero idea what that was supposed to mean, but I DON'T care, so throwing my hands in the air is simply a waste of valuable twinkie energy. I'll leave it up to these guys!

Hmmm... didn't work, I STILL don't care!!!

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Er...Uh...Okay...



Thursday, June 18, 2009

New Cheeze Factory Policy

There is no possible way to check copyright, in-print or status of ANY file. With this in mind, we are now instating a Revolving Door Policy.

WTF is a Revolving Door Policy? you might ask, Skippy.



We-Hell, pretty simply put, posts will be only left Seventy-Two (72) hours. No sense asking for a repost, or more information, not possible. Get 'em while they're hot, you snooze, you lose, you sleep, you weep, you hold'em, you fold'em (I have no idea what that last one meant, but it couldn't be a good thing).

We will continue to check status of files for commercially available as we do not wish to infringe upon anyone's rights.

It is simply impossible to check the status of anything published after 1923.

If you submitted a file which is commercially available, it will not be posted. If you submitted a file out of print, it will remain for Seventy-Two (72) hours or less dependent upon my mood.

So... there you have it.

The Big Cheeze has spoken!

(Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain)

Laugh.com & DMCA

Blogger has been notified, according to the terms of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA), that certain content in your blog infringes upon the copyrights of others. The URL(s) of the allegedly infringing post(s) may be found at the end of this message.

The notice that we received from Laugh.com, with any personally identifying information removed, will be posted online by a service called Chilling Effects at http://www.chillingeffects.org. We do this in accordance with the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA). You can search for the DMCA notice associated with the removal of your content by going to the Chilling Effects page at http://www.chillingeffects.org/dmca512c, and entering in (1) the URL of the blog post that was removed or (2) the name of the copyright holder in the 'Quick Search' box located at the upper lefthand corner of the page. Please note that it may take Chilling Effects up to several weeks to post the notice online at the link provided.

The DMCA is a United States copyright law that provides guidelines for online service provider liability in case of copyright infringement. We are in the process of removing from our servers the links that allegedly infringe upon the copyrights of others. If we did not do so, we would be subject to a claim of copyright infringement, regardless of its merits. See http://www.educause.edu/Browse/645?PARENT_ID=254 for more information about the DMCA, and see http://www.google.com/dmca.html for the process that Blogger requires in order to make a DMCA complaint.

Blogger can reinstate these posts upon receipt of a counter notification pursuant to sections 512(g)(2) and 3) of the DMCA. For more information about the requirements of a counter notification and a link to a sample counter notification, see http://www.google.com/dmca.html#counter.

Please note that repeated violations to our Terms of Service may result in further remedial action taken against your Blogger account. If you have legal questions about this notification, you should retain your own legal counsel. If you have any other questions about this notification, please let us know.

Sincerely,

The Blogger Team

Affected URLs:

http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/06/kay-martin-her-bodyguards-i-know-what.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/06/mae-west-wild-christmas.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/05/don-knotts-evening-with-me-1961.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/06/skillet-leroy-okra-eaters-1974.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/05/belle-barth-my-next-story-is-bit-risque.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/06/groucho-marx-lydia-tattood-lady.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/06/martin-mull-in-soop-1974.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/06/flandes-and-swann-at-drop-of-hat.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/06/jack-e-leonard-scream-on-someone-you.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/06/judy-canova-in-hi-fi.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/05/ruth-wallis-aka-ruth-shirley-wohl.html
http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2009/06/murry-roman-blind-mans-movie.html

Monday, June 15, 2009

Perverted Secretions?


We-hell, then, Skippy!
Be gettin' yer bad secretin' self some

MELACHOL!


78% Guaranteed To Cure What Ails Ya!
(it's PAINLESS!)

Sunday, June 14, 2009

It's Officially...Bi-Polar Bovine Week(That's "MAD COW" In Smart Talk)



What Were They Thinking?



Something terribly wrong with this product or is it just me?

A Famous Personage Sez:


Visited The Future
&
Dr. Forrest's Cheeze Factory
&
All I Got Was This Stupid Hat!

KazookeyleleThe Final Countdown


Prospective Hare Club Fer De Women Member



Got Dat E-Vil Mikelj Over A Barrel!


That's right, Skippy!
Here we see the E-Vil Mikelj's latest business endeavor!
Seems quite pleased with himself, eh?

You, the consumer, have foiled him again!
Not so pleased with himself now, eh?

Blarr, harr, hardy harr harr!

Rut Ro!



Stop It!Stop It RIGHT NOW!


That's right, Skippy!
We've seen you,
at the mall,
walking down the street,
reaching for your binocs!

Stop It!
Stop it
RIGHT NOW!


Ask Dat Cheezemeister

Dear Cheeze Munster;

After visiting the Cheeze Factory, I'm avoided by most
(my dog still seems to like me).
Expressions change whenever I approach.
Pray tell, what's up with that?

Signed,
A Must To Avoid

Dear Musky;

Many who visit seem preoccupied with the Cheeze Stuffs,
so much so they seem to exude cheeze from the very depths of their beings.
In checking the staff, we've rooted our way
to the bottom of this common problem.
Please refer to the following illustration:

Signed,
The Very Clean Big Cheezer


(If it's 99 44/100% pure what's that other .56% stuff? Scary!)

Hooked On Dat Hare Club Fer De Mens



Appears as if celebs get twice da benefits! Bah!

And Yet AnotherWhat Were They Thinking?



Incrapitable!

Don't Be ASuperhoarder!



Another "Satisfied" Customer



Sez: "Thanks Hare Club For De Womens!"

Health Department Bamboozeled!



What Were They Thinking?



Things Dat Make Ya Go, Yummm....

Impotant Stuff!



Pie Charts...Hmmm... Aaaaahhhh!



Hare Club For Males, Grrrrrr.....



What Were They Thinking?



Ask Dat Cheezemeister

Hey, Big Cheeze;

Hair Club For Men is expensive, opting for a Chapeau, but a bit confused. Help a dude out, eh?

Signed,
The Dude

Dear Dud;

The following instructions should clear up your confusion!

Signed,
The Big Bored With It All


(Being referred to as "Asshat" wasn't a clue?)

Which Came FirstDa StinkOR Da Cheeze?



New & Emoproved!


What's that, Skippy?
Not enough drama in yer life?
Feel the need to get punched in the ass real good?
We-Hell, with
Hare Club For De Mens' New & Improved Emo Series
you are GUARANTEED to get more ass punches,
unless yer face is more convenient!

Finally!An Impotant Answer!



Lies!Lies!Dere All LIES!


A certain Skippetta accused us of spying on our visitors.
LIES!
LIES!
DERE ALL LIES!

And Yet Another Warning!Take Heed!(Don't Ignore It THIS Time!)


It has come to our attention certain Skippys have NOT paid attention to numerous warnings to NOT visit the Cheeze Factory while at your chosen place of drudgery.
PAY ATTENTION!

For the last time...
Don't be THAT guy!

You Want De Truth?You CAN'T Handle De Truth!


Our staff of statisticians
(ok, the guy what cleans up)
wasted precious mop-up time in preparing this sucky graph!

Overstocked, MUST Go!


Well, Skippy,
been wantin' one o' dem Vanilla Ice "action" figures,
but the cost is too dear?

Never fear (hey that rhymed!)
our newest sponsor just got in a bunch of factory seconds
(missing digits)
&
can now pass the savings on to you!

Ask Dat Cheezemeister

Dear Cheezemeister;

Joined the Hair Club For The Mens and am extremely disappointed!
Bah!

Signed Takes a REAL man to wear it off!

Dear Worn out;

Ah, yes, picture enclosed indicates you believe REAL men don't need no stinkin' instructions.

YA GOT IT ON UPSIDE-DOWN, EEDIOT!

Signed Big Cheeze's feminine side


Health Tip Of Da Day



Facts Of LifeNOT Dat Cheezy TV Show!



Cheeze Factory,Better 'un A VacationAt Da Yoopers Tourist Trap!



Maroon 5Wake Up Call



"Wake Up Call"

[Verse]

I didn't hear what you were saying.
I live on raw emotion baby
I answer questions never maybe
And I'm not kind if you betray me.
So who the hell are you to say we
Never would have made it babe.

[Bridge]

If you needed love
Well then ask for love
Could have given love
Now I’m taking love
And it’s not my fault
Cause you both deserve
What is coming now
So don’t say a word

[Chorus]

Wake up call
Caught you in the morning with another one in my bed
Don't you care about me anymore?
Don’t you care about me? I don't think so.
Six foot tall
Came without a warning so I had to shoot him dead
He won't come around here anymore
Come around here? I don't think so.

[Breakdown]

Would have bled to make you happy
You didn't need to treat me that way
And now you beat me at my own game
And now I find you sleeping soundly
And your lovers screaming loudly
Hear a sound and hit the ground

[Bridge]

If you needed love
Well then ask for love
Could have given love
Now I’m taking love
And it’s not my fault
Cause you both deserve
What’s coming now

So don’t say a word

[Chorus]

Wake up call
Caught you in the morning with another one in my bed
Don't you care about me anymore?
Don’t you care about me? I don't think so.
Six foot tall
Came without a warning so I had to shoot him dead
He won't come around here anymore
Come around here?
I don’t feel so bad, I don’t feel so bad, I don’t feel so bad

[Breakdown]

I'm so sorry darling
Did I do the wrong thing?
Oh, what was I thinking?
Is his heart still beating?

Woah oh ohh

[Chorus]

Wake up call
Caught you in the morning with another one in my bed
Don't you care about me anymore?
Don’t you care about me? I don't think so.
Six foot tall
Came without a warning so I had to shoot him dead
He won't come around here anymore
Come around here anymore? I don’t feel so bad

Wake up call
Caught you in the morning with another one in my bed
Don’t you care about me anymore?
Don’t you care about me? I don’t think so.
Six foot tall
Came without a warning so I had to shoot him dead
He won’t come around here anymore
No, he won’t come around here. I don’t feel so bad

I don’t feel so bad (Wake up call)
I don’t feel so bad (Caught you in the morning with another one in my bed)
I don’t feel so bad (Don’t you care about me anymore?)
Care about me? I don’t feel so bad.
Wake up call
Caught you in the morning with another one in my bed
Don't you care about me anymore?

Ask Dat Cheezemeister

Dear Non-Hoarder;

Where's dem nekkid chicks?

This IS an internet blog, isn't it?

Signed, Loves dat prono!

Dear Portopotty;

Ok, here ya go, enjoy!

Signed, Dat Big Stinker


Coming To A Cheeze Factory Near You SOON!



Village PeopleYMCA



For Bachelors or Married Duds


Ok, Skippy, pesky underwear in disrepair?
What to do?
10 for $10 package?
NO WAY!
A REAL man can fix anything!
and...
Don't waste precious duct tape!
How's 'bout this?

Red Skippy's Latest Letter



Free PassJust For You!



Figures!



Another Celebamonial




Let me tell you the story of Good & Evil!

Cheeze = Good
Mikelj = E-Vil

Don't Be THAT Guy!


Fist bone's connected to the skull bone!

Remember, hoard & get yer brainpan boinked!